Animal Behavior

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Smokey_with_Thomas_Tidwell,_Chief_of_the_United_States_Forest_Service,_and_Arnold_Schwarzenegger.jpg

Guidelines for wearers of a Smokey Bear costume, from the U.S. Forest Service’s Smokey Bear FAQ:

  1. The person wearing the costume must exhibit appropriate animation to be effective. Express sincerity and interest in the appearance by moving paws, head, and legs.
  2. There shall be at least one uniformed escort to accompany the Bear. The escort shall guide the Bear at the elbow.
  3. After donning the costume, the escort shall inspect the suit. Check for the following:
  4. Is the drawstring tucked in?
    Is the zipper out of sight?
    Are the buttons fastened?
    Is the belt firmly fastened to the pants?
    Are the pant cuffs neat?
    Is the hat crown up?
    Is the head straight on the shoulders?
    Is the fur brushed generously?

  5. A private dressing room is necessary for putting on and taking off the costume.
  6. The costumed bear should not force itself on anyone. Do not walk rapidly toward small children.
  7. A round-point shovel is part of the Smokey Bear image. It shall be used for appearances, when appropriate.
  8. The costume becomes hot to the wearer after a very short period. Success has been noted with the use of compartmentalized “ice vests” and the addition of a battery-operated fan in the hat. Several cooling options are available from the costume manufacturers. Limit appearances to 15-20 minute segments to minimize personal discomfort.
  9. After each appearance, check the costume for needed repairs or cleaning. Note this on the outside of the storage box for immediate follow-up by the owner/manager of the costume.

Costumed users must not speak during appearances, must never appear in less than full costume, and must appear dignified and friendly. “Do not use alcohol or illicit drugs prior to and during the Smokey Bear appearance. This condition applies to uniformed escorts as well.”

In a Word

http://www.psacard.com/cardfacts/baseball-cards/1955-topps/norm-zauchin-176/24769

pernicity
n. swiftness, quickness, agility

discoverture
n. the state of not having a husband

supersalient
adj. leaping upon

desponsate
adj. married

The Fenway Millionaires also have a ‘sleeper’ in Norm Zauchin, a massive fellow just out of the Army. Don’t underestimate him. When he was at Birmingham he pursued a twisting foul ball into a front row box. He clutched frantically. He missed grabbing the ball but he did grab a girl, Janet Mooney. This might not be considered a proper introduction by Emily Post but it worked for Zauchin. He married the gal. Nope. Don’t underestimate an opportunist like that.

— Arthur Daley, “Life Among the Millionaires,” New York Times, March 11, 1954

Misc

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:The_story_of_the_greatest_nations,_from_the_dawn_of_history_to_the_twentieth_century_-_a_comprehensive_history,_founded_upon_the_leading_authorities,_including_a_complete_chronology_of_the_world,_and_(14586608739).jpg

  • FRENCH REVOLUTION is an anagram of VIOLENCE RUN FORTH.
  • Aldous Huxley was George Orwell’s French teacher.
  • West Side Story was originally called East Side Story.
  • The Labrador dog is from Newfoundland, and the Newfoundland dog is from Labrador.
  • “I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education.” — Wilson Mizner

Size Matters

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Pomological_Watercolor_POM00007412.jpg

In June 1917, the California Olive Association adopted the following rather terrifying size designations:

Olives counting 120-135 olives per pound: Standard
Olives counting 105-120 olives per pound: Medium
Olives counting 90-105 olives per pound: Large
Olives counting 75-90 olives per pound: Extra Large
Olives counting 65-75 olives per pound: Mammoth
Olives counting 55-65 olives per pound: Colossal
Olives counting 45-55 olives per pound: Giant

Over the years they added Jumbo, Supercolossal, and Special Supercolossal. It wasn’t until the the 1970s that the government stepped in to limit further growth: “The Department of Agriculture feels that most people would not be able to figure out which are the larger olives, except at the range of smaller sizes, whose names are the more straightforward.”

While we’re at it — champagne bottles have some impressive names of their own:

0.1875 liters: Piccolo
0.2 liters: Quarter
0.375 liters: Demi
0.75 liters: Standard
1.5 liters: Magnum
3 liters: Jéroboam
4.5 liters: Réhoboam
6 liters: Methusaleh
9 liters: Salmanazar
12 liters: Balthazar
15 liters: Nebuchadnezzar
18 liters: Solomon
26.25 liters: Sovereign
27 liters: Primat
30 liters: Melchizedek

(Thanks, Drew.)

Attitude

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Harvey_Ball.jpg

The designer of the smiley, commercial artist Harvey Ball, never trademarked it and received just $45 for his work.

His son said, “He was not a money-driven guy. He used to say, ‘Hey, I can only eat one steak at a time, drive one car at a time.'”

(Thanks, Drake.)