Futility Closet

294 miles south of Paradise, Michigan … is Hell, Michigan.

In the U.S. Army, men in uniform may not carry umbrellas.

The lowest toll ever charged to cross the Panama Canal was 36 cents — paid by adventurer Richard Halliburton when he swam its length in 1928.

Massachusetts’ Lake Chargoggagoggmanchauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg has the longest place name in the United States.

Locals call it Webster Lake.

It’s possible to have $1.19 and still be unable to make change for a dollar.

Wyoming may be the Cowboy State, but it has an Eastern pedigree: It was named by an Ohio congressman after a valley in Pennsylvania.

Rep. J.M. Ashley named the territory after the Wyoming Valley, whose name means “at the big river flat.”

Still, that’s more authentic than Idaho.

Twenty percent of the world’s fresh water is in a single lake, Russia’s Lake Baikal.

Its surface is smaller than Lake Superior — but it’s a mile deep.

Only 17 countries are larger than Alaska.

If you’re an extrovert, you’ll be happiest (in principle) in northeastern Pakistan. That’s the world center of population — from there, the average distance to every human on earth is only 3,200 miles.

Conversely, if you’re an introvert you should visit Easter Island, where you’ll be 9,300 miles from the average fellow man.

See also Point Nemo and Vroom!

California and Florida both have an Orange County.

By coincidence, one contains Disneyland, the other Disney World.