“College isn’t the place to go for ideas.” — Helen Keller
Nonsense Botany
From Edward Lear’s “Nonsense Botany” (1871):
Bottlephorkia Spoonifolia.
Manypeeplia Upsidownia.
Phattfacia Stupenda.
Piggiwiggia Pyramidalis.
Smile!
- “They were doing a full back shot of me in a swimsuit and I thought, Oh my God, I have to be so brave. See, every woman hates herself from behind.” — Cindy Crawford
- “I think, If my butt’s not too big for them to be photographing it, then it shouldn’t be too big for me.” — Christy Turlington
- “I wish my butt did not go sideways, but I guess I have to face that.” — Christie Brinkley
- “Everywhere I went, my cleavage followed. But I learned I am not my cleavage.” — Carole Mallory
- “Because modeling is lucrative, I’m able to save up and be more particular about the acting roles I take.” — Kathy Ireland, star of Alien From L.A. and Danger Island
- “I haven’t seen the Eiffel Tower, Notre Dame, the Louvre. I haven’t seen anything. I don’t really care.” — Tyra Banks
- “My husband was just OK looking. I was in labor and I said to him, ‘What if she’s ugly? You’re ugly.'” — Beverly Johnson
- “I don’t wake up for less than $10,000 a day.” — Linda Evangelista
Evangelista also said, “I can do anything you want me to do so long as I don’t have to speak.”
In a Word
growlery
n. a retreat for times of ill humor
“Post-Prandial Pessimists”
First Decadent: “After all, Smythe, what would life be without coffee?”
Second Decadent: “True, Jeohnes, true! And yet, after all, what is life with coffee?”
— Punch, Oct. 15, 1892
A Farewell Letter
A farewell letter from kamikaze pilot Masahisa Uemura to his daughter:
Motoko,
You often looked and smiled at my face. You also slept in my arms, and we took baths together. When you grow up and want to know about me, ask your mother and Aunt Kayo.
My photo album has been left for you at home. I gave you the name Motoko, hoping you would be a gentle, tender-hearted, and caring person.
I want to make sure you are happy when you grow up and become a splendid bride, and even though I die without you knowing me, you must never feel sad.
When you grow up and want to meet me, please come to Kudan [a national shrine for fallen soldiers]. And if you pray deeply, surely your father’s face will show itself within your heart. I believe you are happy. Since your birth you started to show a close resemblance to me, and other people would often say that when they saw little Motoko they felt like they were meeting me. Your uncle and aunt will take good care of you with you being their only hope, and your mother will only survive by keeping in mind your happiness throughout your entire lifetime. Even though something happens to me, you must certainly not think of yourself as a child without a father. I am always protecting you. Please be a person who takes loving care of others.
When you grow up and begin to think about me, please read this letter.
Father
He added a postscript: “P.S. In my airplane, I keep as a charm a doll you had as a toy when you were born. So it means Motoko was together with Father. I tell you this because you being here without knowing makes my heart ache.”
Poem
Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,
A medley of extemporanea,
And love is a thing that can never go wrong,
And I am Marie of Roumania.
— Dorothy Parker
Har, Jim Lad
Pirates get a bad rap. Their trade was often the only course open to a poor person in the 17th century, and as an institution it treated its people uncommonly well, if you overlook the pillaging and murder.
On the Spanish Main, most pirate ships were democracies. You elected your captain, and you could vote to replace him. Spoils were divided evenly. Morale was generally high, so much so that pirates often overwhelmed trade vessels by force of numbers. And there was even a social insurance system, so a wounded pirate would be guaranteed money or gold at a certain scale.
Best of all, buccaneers were egalitarian. If they took a slave ship, they freed the slaves. Occasionally they’d force carpenters or other specialists to sail with them, but they’d free them afterward, and they could join the crew if they chose. That’s more noble, in its way, than a lot of lawful enterprises.
Highest-Grossing Films
Highest-grossing films worldwide, to date:
- Titanic (1997)
- The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)
- Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (2001)
- Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace (1999)
- The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)
- Jurassic Park (1993)
- Shrek 2 (2004)
- Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)
- Finding Nemo (2003)
- The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)
At first that looks like a triumph of modern marketing — all of these films were made in the last 12 years. But here are the top ten when receipts are adjusted for inflation:
- Gone With the Wind (1939)
- Star Wars (1977)
- The Sound of Music (1965)
- E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982)
- The Ten Commandments (1956)
- Titanic (1997)
- Jaws (1975)
- Doctor Zhivago (1965)
- The Exorcist (1973)
- Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937)
Titanic has made $1.8 billion worldwide to date, and it’s only number 6 on the all-time list. Gone With the Wind has made $3.8 billion, more than twice as much.
Aerogel
Yup, that’s a brick.
It’s sitting on Aerogel, “frozen smoke,” the world’s lowest-density solid. The stuff is 99.8% air but can support 2,000 times its own weight, and it holds 15 entries in the Guinness Book of Records.
Most amazingly, it was first created in 1931.