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High and Dry

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Ararat_anomaly_1949.jpeg

This is a classified photo of Mount Ararat, Turkey’s tallest mountain, taken by the U.S. Defense Intelligence Agency in 1949.

That dark area is the “Ararat anomaly,” an unknown object perched on the edge of a precipice at about 15,500 feet. Biblical literalists think it’s the remains of Noah’s Ark. The U.S. government says it’s “linear facades in the glacial ice underlying more recently accumulated ice and snow.”

For now, it’s a stalemate — no one’s been able to reach it yet because the Turkish military controls the area.

In a Word

flimp
v. to rob (someone) while a partner hustles

That Explains It

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:DowntownChicagoILatNight.jpg

Chicago means “land of smelly onions.”

That’s how the native Potawatomi described the swampy area next to Lake Michigan. French explorers picked up the name, and it stuck.

Planning Ahead

The crypt next to Marilyn Monroe’s belongs to Hugh Hefner.

He paid $85,000 for it.

What’s Odd?

How quickly can you find out what is unusual about this paragraph? It looks so ordinary that you would think that nothing was wrong with it at all and, in fact, nothing is. But it is unusual. Why? If you study it and think about it you may find out, but I am not going to assist you in any way. You must do it without coaching. No doubt, if you work at it for long, it will dawn on you. Who knows? Go to work and try your skill. Par is about half an hour.

Click for Answer

Straight and Narrow

An optical illusion.

The horizontal lines are parallel.

“The One-Man Vaudeville Show”

“I will now give an imitation of three Hawaiians. This is one (whistles), this is another (plays ukulele), and this is the third (marks time with his foot). I could imitate four Hawaiians just as easily, but I will tell you the reason why I don’t do it. You see, I bought a horse for $50, and it turned out to be a running horse. I was offered $15,000 for him, and I took it. I built a house with the $15,000, and when it was finished a neighbor offered me $100,000 for it. He said my house stood right where he wanted to dig a well. So I took the $100,000 to accommodate him. I invested the $100,000 in peanuts, and that year there was a peanut famine, so I sold the peanuts for $350,000. Now, why should a man with $350,000 bother to imitate four Hawaiians?”

– Joe Cook, vaudeville performer

Limerick

A decrepit old gas man named Peter,
While hunting around for the meter,
Touched a leak with his light.
He arose out of sight,
And, as anyone can see by reading this, he also destroyed the meter.

– Anonymous

Stature in Washington

http://www.sxc.hu/photo/330177

At the time of its construction, the Washington Monument was the tallest building in the world.

Palindromes

Real-life palindromes:

  • MALAYALAM is a language of southern India.
  • EKALAKA LAKE exists in southeastern Montana.
  • DR. (Michael) AWKWARD is Longstreet Professor of English and Afro-American Literature at Emory University.