Ernest Hemingway published this “blank verse” in his high school literary magazine in 1916:
Get it? David Morice followed up with this “punctuation poem” in Word Ways in February 2012:
% , & —
+ . ? /
” :
% ;
+ $ [ \
It’s a limerick:
Percent comma ampersand dash
Plus period question mark slash
Quotation mark colon
Percent semicolon
Plus dollar sign bracket backslash
(Thanks, Volodymyr.)
LEG and RUN share the same “bit” pattern in Morse code:
·-·· · --·
·-· ··- -·
So do EARN and URN (which are also homophones):
· ·- ·-· -·
··- ·-· -·
(Discovered by Philip Cohen.)
UPDATE: Reader Dave Lawrence wrote a script to find more of these. He found 2,900, including these highlights:
[one_third]TEMPT YAK[/one_third][one_third]ATTIC JINN[/one_third][one_third]SUAVE SINNER[/one_third]
[one_third]KILL TRUSTEE[/one_third][one_third]NIACIN BANNER[/one_third][one_third]CONVEX COBALT[/one_third]
[one_third]DRAIN NINETEEN[/one_third][one_third]WOMEN JOKE[/one_third][one_third]OMELETS TODDLE[/one_third]
[one_third]ENZYME APRON[/one_third][one_third]GOAT MEOW[/one_third][one_third]EMINENT PAINT[/one_third]
[one_third]ABSINTHE PHIALS[/one_third][one_third]NIPPLE BANANAS[/one_third][one_third]LEFTIE LEFTS[/one_third]
[one_third]CONTENT COCK[/one_third][one_third]DOTTY TUMMY[/one_third][one_third]PAPER WINGER[/one_third]
[one_third]EERIEST VISIT[/one_third][one_third]GENUINE GAVEL[/one_third][one_third]WETTEST ANGST[/one_third]
[one_third]SPEED SATIRE[/one_third][one_third]REUNITE LEPER[/one_third][one_third]COW COAT[/one_third]
[one_third]CINDER CURVE[/one_third][one_third]FUNK ELEMENT[/one_third][one_third]THOSE BAGS[/one_third]
[one_third]DELIVER BLISTER[/one_third][one_third]CAUSES CRASH[/one_third][one_third]DEFENSIVE THRASHER[/one_third]
[one_third]SKIN STAIN[/one_third][one_third]CHIMNEY CHUTNEY[/one_third][one_third]SOME VOTE[/one_third]
[one_third]PESKIER WHALER[/one_third][one_third]RANDY REMEDY[/one_third][one_third]ESTEEMED SAUCE[/one_third]
[one_third]MANGO TYPO[/one_third][one_third]TEXTUAL CANARD[/one_third][one_third]INANE FEZ[/one_third]
[one_third]REEXAMINE ASTEROID[/one_third][one_third]DEFILE BIBLE[/one_third][one_third]MILKMEN MIRROR[/one_third]
[one_third]BEAT THAT[/one_third][one_third]NEAREST DENTIST[/one_third][one_third]GRANDER GREMLIN[/one_third]
[one_third]TIGER TUNER[/one_third][one_third]SUCH HANDS[/one_third][one_third]INDEXED URINAL[/one_third]
[one_third]TICKLED NECTARINE[/one_third][one_third]JACK ATTACK[/one_third][one_third]GREENISH GLASSES[/one_third]
[one_third]BEBOP DUSTMAN[/one_third][one_third]PATIENCE WIZARD[/one_third][one_third]DRAMA NINJA[/one_third]
[one_third]BAROQUE BAROMETER[/one_third][one_third]NEURON BARON[/one_third][one_third]NEUTRON BACON[/one_third]
[one_third]DISK THEFT[/one_third][one_third]PAMPAS PEOPLE[/one_third][one_third]TROIKA COURT[/one_third]
[one_third]COLLIE TROLLS[/one_third][one_third]MINISCULE MINISKIRTS[/one_third][one_third]MATTED GORE[/one_third]
[one_third]INSULIN INHALER[/one_third][one_third]MEETING GETUP[/one_third][one_third]SELF SERVE[/one_third]
[one_third]KITTEN CAKE[/one_third][one_third]TRUTH CUBE[/one_third][one_third]CHAP TENSING[/one_third]
[one_third]PELICAN ABDICATE[/one_third][one_third]KALE TARTS[/one_third][one_third]TROUSER COUSIN[/one_third]
[one_third]VAST STREET[/one_third][one_third]DISTORTED DIVORCE[/one_third][one_third]BRUNETTE DELEGATE[/one_third]
[one_third]F*CKED ELEMENTAL[/one_third][one_third]MAIZE GNATS[/one_third][one_third]SPOUSE SWATTERS[/one_third]
[one_third]FIRMS INVADE[/one_third][one_third]CHIEF KISSER[/one_third][one_third]SWITCH SPACES[/one_third]
[one_third]THREE NESTS[/one_third][one_third]INVERTING FIRETRAP[/one_third][one_third]MOUSE OTTERS[/one_third]
[one_third]ANALYZE PARROTS[/one_third][one_third]AIMLESS RETCHES[/one_third][one_third]RAWHIDE RAPISTS[/one_third]
[one_third]MINIMAL GLANCE[/one_third][one_third]PRIESTS PRESIDE[/one_third][one_third]INBRED INTESTINE[/one_third]
[one_third]GUFFAW MILDLY[/one_third][one_third]MIDDAY GRAVY[/one_third][one_third]WONDER AMOEBAE[/one_third]
[one_third]PALE AXLE[/one_third][one_third]WHISKEY EMISSARY[/one_third][one_third]CAGED CAMEL[/one_third]
[one_third]MINTIER GENDER[/one_third][one_third]QUEER MAIDEN[/one_third][one_third]ASTERISK AIRLIFT[/one_third]
[one_third]SACRED SEQUEL[/one_third][one_third]ESPIED SEABED[/one_third][one_third]MAIM GNAT[/one_third]
[one_third]TURNIP TURBAN[/one_third][one_third_last]NIGHTIE NIGHTS[one_third_last]
ArnoldC, a language devised by Finnish computer programmer Lauri Hartikka, assigns programming functions to catch phrases from Arnold Schwarzenegger movies. Some keywords:
False: I LIED
True: NO PROBLEMO
If: BECAUSE I’M GOING TO SAY PLEASE
Else: BULLSHIT
EndIf: YOU HAVE NO RESPECT FOR LOGIC
While: STICK AROUND
EndWhile: CHILL
MultiplicationOperator: YOU’RE FIRED
DivisionOperator: HE HAD TO SPLIT
EqualTo: YOU ARE NOT YOU YOU ARE ME
GreaterThan: LET OFF SOME STEAM BENNET
Or: CONSIDER THAT A DIVORCE
And: KNOCK KNOCK
DeclareMethod: LISTEN TO ME VERY CAREFULLY
MethodArguments: I NEED YOUR CLOTHES YOUR BOOTS AND YOUR MOTORCYCLE
Return: I’LL BE BACK
EndMethodDeclaration: HASTA LA VISTA, BABY
AssignVariableFromMethodCall: GET YOUR ASS TO MARS
ReadInteger: I WANT TO ASK YOU A BUNCH OF QUESTIONS AND I WANT TO HAVE THEM ANSWERED IMMEDIATELY
AssignVariable: GET TO THE CHOPPER
SetValue: HERE IS MY INVITATION
EndAssignVariable: ENOUGH TALK
ParseError: WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO WRONG
This program prints the string “hello world”:
IT'S SHOWTIME TALK TO THE HAND "hello world" YOU HAVE BEEN TERMINATED
naufrague
n. a shipwrecked person
meretriculate
v. to deceive in the manner of a prostitute
BOW-STREET — Eliza Merchant, a black-eyed girl, of that class of women known as ‘unfortunates,’ was charged by Garnet Comerford, a sailor, with robbing him of four sovereigns, several dollars and half-crowns, and his shoes. The tar stated that on Wednesday evening, about eight o’clock he left the house of his Captain, the honourable Mr. Duncan, at the west end of town, intending to pay a visit to a sister, whom he had not seen since he left England in the Seringapatem. On the way, he met as tight a looking frigate as ever he clapt his eyes on. She hoisted friendly colours; he hove to; and they agreed together to steer into port. They sailed up the Strand, when she said she would tow him to a snug berth, and he should share her hammock for the night. He consented; and when he awoke in the morning he found that she had cut and run. His rigging had been thrown all about the room, his four sovereigns and silver, and shoes were carried off.
— The Morning Chronicle, Dec. 8, 1828
When the letters in ETCH are advanced uniformly through the alphabet, they produce PENS. Likewise FUSION produces LAYOUT, INKIER produces PURPLY, SLEEP produces BUNNY, and HOTEL produces OVALS. The same technique produces the phrases SAD BEING EMPTY and MY DREAM MAN:
This must mean something.
The final movement on John Coltrane’s 1965 album A Love Supreme is a “musical narration” of a devotional poem that Coltrane included in the album’s liner notes — he put the handwritten poem on a music stand and “played” it as if it were music.
“Coltrane’s hushed delivery sounds deliberately speechlike,” write Ashley Kahn in his 2003 history of the album. “He hangs on to the ends of phrases, repeats them as if for emphasis. He is in fact ‘reading’ through his horn.”
The hidden psalm was marked by New York musicians for decades before Rutgers University musicologist Lewis Porter presented a formal analysis to the American Musicological Society in 1980. “You will find that he plays right to the final ‘Amen’ and then finishes,” he writes in his 1997 biography of the saxophonist. “There are no extra notes up to that point. You will have to make a few adjustments in the poem, however: Near the beginning where it reads, ‘Help us resolve our fears and weaknesses,’ he skips the next line, goes on to ‘In you all things are possible,’ then plays ‘Thank you God’ … towards the end he leaves out ‘I have seen God.'”
“I think music can make the world better and, if I’m qualified, I want to do it,” Coltrane had said. “I’d like to point out to people the divine in a musical language that transcends words. I want to speak to their souls.”
(Thanks, Jeff.)
The lyrics in Italian singer Adriano Celentano’s 1972 single “Prisencolinensinainciusol” sound like American English, but they’re gibberish.
“Ever since I started singing, I was very influenced by American music and everything Americans did,” he told NPR in 2014. “So at a certain point, because I like American slang — which, for a singer, is much easier to sing than Italian — I thought that I would write a song which would only have as its theme the inability to communicate. And to do this, I had to write a song where the lyrics didn’t mean anything.”
It reached number 4 on the Belgian charts in 1973.
chirography
n. one’s own handwriting or autograph; a style or character of writing
What is this? It’s the signature of Treasury Secretary Jack Lew. When Lew was nominated for the post in January 2013, it threatened to appear on all U.S. paper currency for the duration of his tenure.
Barack Obama said, “Jack assures me that he is going to work to make at least one letter legible in order not to debase our currency, should he be confirmed as secretary of the Treasury.” He did so — the current signature is below.
Lew’s predecessor, Timothy Geithner, had a similarly incomprehensible signature and produced a more legible version for the currency. “I took handwriting in the third grade in New Delhi, India,” he said, “so I probably did not get the best instruction on handwriting.”
paralian
n. one who lives near the sea
ultramontane
adj. one who lives beyond mountains
pedionomite
n. an inhabitant of a plain, a dweller in a plain
interamnian
adj. lying between rivers
