Turnabout
ROT13 is a simple way to encipher a message: Just advance each of its letters 13 positions forward in the alphabet. Thus ABC becomes NOP, FUR becomes SHE, and EBBS becomes ROOF.
Curiously, ABJURER and NOWHERE … become each other.
High-Flown
"Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" "revised by a committee of eminent preceptors and scholars":
Shine with irregular, intermitted light, sparkle at intervals, diminutive, luminous, heavenly body.
How I conjecture, with surprise, not unmixed with uncertainty, what you are,
Located, apparently, at such a remote distance from, and at a height so vastly superior to this earth, the planet we inhabit,
Similar in general appearance and refractory powers to the precious primitive octahedron crystal of pure carbon, set in the aerial region surrounding the earth.
— William T. Dobson, Poetical Ingenuities and Eccentricities, 1882
Exit
Unusual methods adopted by suicide victims, compiled by George Kennan for a report in McClure's Magazine, 1908:
- Hanging themselves, or taking poison, in the tops of high trees
- Throwing themselves upon swiftly revolving circular saws
- Exploding dynamite in their mouths
- Thrusting red-hot pokers down their throats
- Hugging red-hot stoves
- Stripping themselves naked and allowing themselves to freeze to death on winter snowdrifts out of doors, or on piles of ice in refrigerator-cars
- Lacerating their throats on barbed-wire fences
- Drowning themselves head downward in barrels
- Suffocating themselves head downward in chimneys
- Diving into white-hot coke-ovens
- Throwing themselves into craters of volcanoes
- Shooting themselves with ingenious combinations of a rifle with a sewing-machine
- Strangling themselves with their hair
- Swallowing poisonous spiders
- Piercing their hearts with corkscrews and darning-needles
- Cutting their throats with handsaws and sheep-shears
- Hanging themselves with grape vines
- Swallowing strips of underclothing and buckles of suspenders
- Forcing teams of horses to tear their heads off
- Drowning themselves in vats of soft soap
- Plunging into retorts of molten glass
- Jumping into slaughter-house tanks of blood
- Decapitation with home-made guillotines
- Self-crucifixion
"One would naturally suppose that a person who had made up his mind to commit suicide would do so in the easiest, most convenient, and least painful way," Kennan concludes, "but the literature of the subject proves conclusively that hundreds of suicides, every year, take their lives in the most difficult, agonizing, and extraordinary ways; and that there is hardly a possible or conceivable method of self-destruction that has not been tried."
Unquote
"It is annoying to be honest to no purpose." — Ovid
Squirmy
An optical illusion. Nothing's moving.
STOP
The first arrest by telegraph took place in 1845. John Tawell poisoned his mistress at her home at Salt Hill and fled by train to London, but police sent the following memorable message ahead to Paddington Station:
A MURDER HAD JUST BEEN COMMITTED AT SALT HILL AND THE SUSPECTED MURDERER WAS SEEN TO TAKE A FIRST CLASS TICKET TO LONDON BY THE TRAIN THAT LEFT SLOUGH AT 7.42 PM. HE IS IN THE GARB OF A KWAKER [the instrument lacked a Q] WITH A BROWN GREAT COAT ON WHICH REACHES HIS FEET. HE IS IN THE LAST COMPARTMENT OF THE SECOND FIRST-CLASS CARRIAGE.
In a London coffee tavern Tawell was confronted by a detective who asked, no doubt triumphantly, "Haven't you just come from Slough?" He was jailed, tried, convicted, and hanged.
“Who Can Read Franklin’s Cipher?”
Benjamin Franklin wrote from Passy, in 1781, a letter to M. Dumas. He said:— 'I have just received a 14, 5, 3, 10, 28, 2, 76, 203, 66, 11, 12, 273, 50, 14, joining 76, 5, 42, 45, 16, 15, 424, 235, 19, 20, 69, 580, 11, 150, 27, 56, 35, 104, 652, 20, 675, 85, 79, 50, 63, 44, 22, 219, 17, 60, 29, 147, 136, 41, but this is not likely to afford 202, 55, 580, 10, 227, 613, 176, 373, 309, 4, 108, 40, 19, 97, 309, 17, 35, 90, 201, 100, 677.' This has never been deciphered. The state department at Washington has no key to it. I submit it for the consideration of the whole world.
– Elliott Sandford, New York World, cited in Henry Williams, A Book of Curious Facts, 1903
Black Humor
Detail from The Magpie on the Gallows, by Pieter Bruegel the Elder.
Actually, you'd be hard pressed to build such a gallows — compare its top to its bottom.
In a Word
cultrivorous
adj. devouring knives
Inclement Weather
In The Atmosphere (1873), Camille Flammarion reports that in the latter part of October 1844, during a hurricane in the south of France, hailstones fell weighing 11 pounds. On May 8, 1802, a piece of ice fell "which measured more than three feet both in length and in width, with a thickness of two and a quarter feet."
Nature (Aug. 30, 1894) reports that a gopher turtle, measuring 6 by 8 inches and entirely encased in ice, fell at Bovina, Miss., during a severe hailstorm there in 1893. Meteorologist Cleveland Abbe suggested that some "special local whirls or gusts" had carried it aloft. The turtle, evidently, had no comment.
