“The Fuels of the Future”
“With the prospect of coal becoming as rare as the dodo itself, the world, we are told by scientists, may still regard with complacency the failure of our ordinary carbon supply. The natural gases and oils of the world will provide the human race with combustible material for untold ages — such at least is the opinion of those who are best informed on the subject.”
– Glasgow Herald, quoted in Scientific American Supplement No. 717, Sept. 28, 1889
“Georges Le Gloupier”
Victims of Belgian “entarteur” Noël Godin, who flings cream pies at the self-important:
- Microsoft CEO Bill Gates
- French novelist Marguerite Duras
- Choreographer Maurice Bejart
- French anchorman Patrick Poivre d’Arvor
- French politician Nicolas Sarkozy
- Filmmaker Jean-Luc Godard
- Philosopher Bernard-Henri Lévy
Godin told The New York Times he’s trying “to function in the service of the capitalist status quo, without really using his intelligence or his imagination.” Touché.
Unquote
“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then give up. No use being a damned fool about it.” — W.C. Fields
Where’s the Father?
A mother is 21 years older than her son. Six years from now, she will be five times his age. Where’s the father?
I won’t give the answer to this one — if you do the math, you’ll know precisely where he is.
Ambitious Cryptid
For an imaginary creature, the Popo Bawa of Zanzibar seems pretty eager for publicity. According to legend, the creature — described as a one-eyed dwarf with batlike wings and sharp talons — seeks out men who deny its existence, sodomizing them for up to an hour and threatening longer, and repeated, attacks unless they tell their friends and neighbors about the experience.
Strangely, the creature’s attacks are said to rise and fall with the local election cycle. Maybe it’s campaigning.
Order!
The U.S. Senate used the same gavel for 165 years, from its inception until 1954, when the vice president splintered it during a heated debate on nuclear energy.
Who broke it? Richard Nixon.
“God Regrets the Error”
In a 1632 version of the King James Bible, the printers omitted a “not” from Exodus 20:14, so the seventh commandment read “Thou shalt commit adultery.”
The printers were fined 300 pounds, a lifetime’s wages, and most of the copies were recalled. Eleven still exist.
Bonus erratum: In Myles Coverdale’s 1535 Bible, Psalms 91:5 read: “Thou shall not nede to be afrayed for eny bugges by night.” Should have been “afrayed for eny terror.”
Beauty and the Beast
Last year Sharon Tendler married a bottle-nosed dolphin.
Tendler, 41, first became captivated with the animal during a dolphinarium show in Eilat, Israel. She visited him regularly for 15 years (“The peace and tranquility under water, and his love, would calm me down”) and finally approached the trainer for permission for an unofficial ceremony.
On Dec. 28, 2005, Tendler walked down the dock in a white silk dress, kissed the dolphin, and whispered “I love you” into his blowhole (video). They had to make some concessions, of course: Instead of rice, the crowd threw mackerel.
Sign Wave
Admire it while you can — this is the most frequently stolen street sign in Austria.
Unquote
“Fancy being remembered around the world for the invention of a mouse!” — Walt Disney, during his last illness
